THIS IS A POST ABOUT KIWI EGGS

"macanamera" (macanamera) 02/16/2016 at 12:45 • Filed to: None

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you could be a kiwi

ESSSIX GmbH - Accountant/Wagon Thumper > macanamera 02/16/2016 at 12:47

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The biology is amazing..

Berang > macanamera 02/16/2016 at 12:54

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Kiwis might be the type of bird to enjoy that sort of thing.

SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman > macanamera 02/16/2016 at 12:54

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I’d love to see that cloaca

themanwithsauce - has as many vehicles as job titles > SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman 02/16/2016 at 13:04

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StingrayJake > macanamera 02/16/2016 at 13:05

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macanamera > ESSSIX GmbH - Accountant/Wagon Thumper 02/16/2016 at 13:05

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It really is, up to a quarter of the body weight of the mother and thoughout a lifetime tens and tens of eggs can be laid. Yikes.

macanamera > StingrayJake 02/16/2016 at 13:07

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the kiwi egg is at least 3.1 courics

Nibby > SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman 02/16/2016 at 13:08

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out of context, that might be one of the weirdest posts here ever

yamahog > macanamera 02/16/2016 at 13:10

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Go get yourself pregnant and see how much fun a “large investment in offspring” is as a mammal before you tell anyone not to complain.

#mansplaining gets me #salty, because pregnancy fucking sucks and childbirth still kills more women in the US than any other developed country.

Chariotoflove > Nibby 02/16/2016 at 13:23

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Even in context it still is.

macanamera > yamahog 02/16/2016 at 13:25

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?

cool your jets

That egg makes up almost 30 percent of the kiwis weight. For a 140 pound human female, that’s a 42 pound baby

A. 42. Pound. Baby.

—-

also #mansplaining wtf get out of here it’s a post about huge fucking kiwi eggs

yamahog > macanamera 02/16/2016 at 13:30

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We don’t even need 42lb ones to literally kill people, so the hierarchy of suffering thing is really not cool and would’ve been just as “wow crazy how nature do” without it. Must be nice not to have any skin in the game so you can tell other people to stop complaining and cool their jets about shit that can disable and kill them.

And yes, “human women stop complaining” is textbook mansplaining. Idgaf about the kiwi egg bit, you’re the one who decided to run with that title and double down on it.

Diesel > macanamera 02/16/2016 at 13:37

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I feel like I've taken this shit before.

Xyl0c41n3 > macanamera 02/16/2016 at 13:40

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How about you try not telling women what we can or cannot complain about?.

You try having your pelvis expand to 10 centimeters within the span of just a couple of hours, having your perineum ripped open (or surgically cut) from the stretching, and then shoving a living, breathing human out of that opening. Try going to the bathroom with stitches between your hoohaa and your asshole. Try having fluid discharge from your vagina for a MONTH after childbirth (sometimes longer) as your uterus slowly works its way back to its pre-pregnancy status. Try being incontinent every time you laugh or sneeze.

Pregnancy, and the resultant childbirth, is one of the most taxing, brutal and violent processes our bodies can endure. Please don’t try to be cute by minimizing pregnancy and childbirth, especially when it’s something you will never experience for yourself.

macanamera > yamahog 02/16/2016 at 13:40

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macanamera > Xyl0c41n3 02/16/2016 at 13:41

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OH MY GOD

ITS A FUCKING BIRD

LAYING A VERY LARGE EGG

LOOK HOW LARGE THE EGG IS

macanamera > Nibby 02/16/2016 at 13:42

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in context, its pretty fucking weird

Xyl0c41n3 > macanamera 02/16/2016 at 13:46

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And if you had couched your post in those terms, this post wouldn’t be problematic at all.

Yes, it is a tiny fucking bird that lays huge fucking eggs, but the second you decided to add the qualifier telling women to stop complaining about human childbirth, and then telling the human women who objected to that to “cool your jets,” then this post went from being “Woah! check out the awesomeness of nature!” to “Woah! Let’s be sexist because it’s funny! Huehuehue!”

You diminished women in the original version of this post (which I see you’ve changed now), and you’ve diminished us again by responding to the criticism with dismissal and snide jokes. That’s not ok, mac. We’ve had a few conversations before, you and I. I know you’re better than that.

yamahog > macanamera 02/16/2016 at 13:47

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I appreciate the new title, thanks for hearing me out. Poor dang kiwi birds.

macanamera > yamahog 02/16/2016 at 13:49

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please just never say “mansplaining” to me again

i don’t know what that is and i never want to

macanamera > Xyl0c41n3 02/16/2016 at 13:50

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to be fair, you know nothing about me

i could easily be a serial killer who punches baby animals and steals candy from children

Xyl0c41n3 > macanamera 02/16/2016 at 13:53

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Nope, I don’t, except for what I read on the internet.

You could be a serial killer, but I highly doubt it. What I do know so far is that you’ve got an adorable pup, you’re usually pretty sweet, and generally pretty nice, today notwithstanding. I also know that you and I have had some interesting conversations before, both here and in chat. My instincts about people are rarely wrong, and my gut says you’re good people.

yamahog > macanamera 02/16/2016 at 13:54

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If you never do it again, I’ll never have to :)

man·splain

manspln/

verb

informal

gerund or present participle: mansplaining

(of a man) explain (something) to someone, typically a woman, in a manner regarded as condescending or patronizing. “I’m listening to a guy mansplain economics to his wife”

macanamera > yamahog 02/16/2016 at 13:58

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im afraid to ask but

It doesn’t even have to be gender related? Any time I explain anything to a woman in a condescending manner, its mansplaining?

Xyl0c41n3 > macanamera 02/16/2016 at 14:11

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Yep. Pretty much.

I’ll give you an example. My Fiesta is under recall right now because it’s got that bad DCT that’s been plaguing pretty much every Fiesta and Focus built within the last 3-4 years. It also had a couple of other recalls on it, like a faulty door latch and a couple of other things. So, my dad and I switched cars for a week so he could drop it off at the dealership. The other recalls didn’t really concern me that much, but I was positive my trans needed to be looked at because jellybean shudders like a mo-fo during shifting in low gears, and it’s gotten progressively worse the longer I’ve had the car.

So anyway... dad takes the car in, and they give it back to him two days later. Now, clearly, there’s no way that a busy dealer, with only one transmission guy, could have examined the car, ordered parts, and fixed all the recalls, including the one affecting the transmission, all in one day (they left it sitting in the lot for the first day). So on my day off, I went back to the dealership myself and spoke to the service technician. Asked him if they had even driven my car or looked at the transmission. He said no. I asked why, he said because the trans only had an extended warranty. I said, yeah, it has the extended warranty because so many of these DCTs are faulty and wind up being replaced (often three or more times per car). I asked him how he would know whether or not mine was faulty if they didn’t even check it. He said “We don’t go looking for problems in people’s cars.”

Now, right then, I wanted to lose it, but I didn’t. Instead, I asked him when his transmission specialist would be in the service shop again so I could drop my car back off again. I told him I wanted them to take a look at the transmission. He said, “Fine, bring it back Wednesday, but in the meantime, here’s some literature that explains how DCT engines work” and handed me a piece of paper.

Again, I wanted to lose it, but I didn’t. I looked him in the eye and said “I know how dual clutch transmissions work, and I’m telling you mine is faulty.”

Took the car back when he told me to. Lo! and behold! It needs a new clutch.

But him treating me like an idiot and assuming I wouldn’t know how my own car works was mansplaining. And it was bullshit.

yamahog > macanamera 02/16/2016 at 14:15

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Like if my objection wasn’t childbirth related, would I still call it that? Depends on the tone. After years of it, you can tell when someone is talking to you like an equal and when it’s just slathered in unspoken “I’m a man and therefore I know more than you, no matter what.” Like when this dude at a car show refused to believe me that Challengers are still available in RWD, (even though I worked on that car!), and then same guy ate up anything and everything my then-bf said about Mustangs just because.

SnapUndersteer, Italian Spiderman > macanamera 02/16/2016 at 14:44

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Welcome. Have you met me before?

Lol

ESSSIX GmbH - Accountant/Wagon Thumper > macanamera 02/16/2016 at 16:02

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I hope you feel educated... Science and sociology in one day... LOL

This whole comment thread was awesome, and you should have left the title.. People love inserting their own feeling where ever they please, fuck’em. You said what you meant and meant what you said.